Archive for mooji

Achieving Enlightenment?

Posted in My path with tags , , , , , , , on November 24, 2009 by freedomofnow

And so monday the 23rd November 2009 came. Me and Ingerid and John had agreed on this day for our satsang so that we could combine it with listening in to Mooji over the internet.

Let me back up a bit first though. That night I had a dream where I was in the crossfire of guns, moving up to a really tall tower where people sat at computers and modified your existence. They provided me with all the money I could ever want, took a look at me and said “You need more mana.” They pressed a button and the blue mana bar went to the top. I told Ingerid and John about this and they interpreted it as me still trying to “fix” things, making an effort to acquire wisdom. Keeping things simple was the theme of the day. John had also received an email from the father of a mongoloid friend he spent a lot of time with when he was in his stage of releasing all that he had built up. He had an older friend that had just died, and his father wanted to know how he was going to tell his son that his best friend had died. The reply that John sent moved me to tears. He said that he was simply there to show this old man the unconditional love that he is, and that his purpose done, this task was over. I had tears in my eyes when I came to the end. We talked about so-called retarded people and how they are really sitting behind their own shoulders watching the world through eyes of unconditional love that few people see. They are living examples of how profoundly beautiful simplicity is.

I finally received my paycheck around 4 o’clock that day so we went down to the store to buy some food for the evening, and a 777 stared at me. I asked John what it meant, and he said it definitely was a validation of the dream. 777 is a 3, the holy trinity. At the store we saw not one, but a total of 3 retarded men.. I was definitely being told to keep it simple. We bought some food, candy and then went home. We had a delicious salad and some ravioli while we waited for Mooji to come online at 6pm, and eventually he did. I had the same feeling in my stomach as the last time I was going to talk to him. The provider seemed to have some problems and the first 20 minutes were very broken up, but eventually people got through to ask questions, and we decided to call in. We got through after very little time, but something was wrong so we had to call again. While we tried to set up another laptop for the conversation, the entire audio feed just went dead. We joked about saying between the 3 of us and Mooji we brought too much light for the channel to handle. Either way, no Mooji on that day. We sat and talked and Ingerid decided she needed some more housework done so we turned the satsang into a regular visit and I helped her with whatever she needed.

I felt increasingly curious about why I had shown myself the number 3 so many times that day, and John said that I am devoted to my ascension. It is the main focus in my life right now. However, the focus of wanting ascension is the very thing that pushes it away, because it very much involves effort. Therefore, the words that Ingerid told me when I first started talking to her “I AM, I AM THAT I AM, I KNOW” is what closes the gap of separation and lets you sink into the depths of your Self. I AM THAT I AM actually showerd itself to me earlier that evening through a part of the documentary called the Moses Code. I realized that I was indeed striving for ascension, and said “Ok, so I have to give up the search for ascension?” They both nodded, and Ingerid said “You are already enlightened.” I said ok, and let go of the striving. It seems letting go of things gets easier the more you do it, because I have seen the Absolute Truth, and it is an experience nothing in this world can be compared to. As Mooji says in one of his videos: “You are trading eternity for a peanut.” Everything the mind can hold on to is the peanut. Some minutes later an overwhelming sense of panic struck me. It felt like I was disappearing, my legs were shaky, and an increasing stream of thoughts passed by me. I was calm at the same time as the panic was going on, but that didn’t make it feel less of what it was. I was just aware of it in a different way. The panic kept on throughout the evening. We watched a movie and suddenly it was 2am and time to go home.

That night I am sure I cried 1 hour of “real” time during the night. I had several dreams, but one seemed more significant than the others. I was being chased down by 2 of my childhood friends, they kept jumping on me and hurting me and I couldn’t do anything about it. Suddenly we had magic cards in our hands, and they still kept hurting me. I tried to hurt them back and finally I managed to hurt them enough that they would leave me alone. When they did I started crying. I cried and cried and cried. It was like a bottomless well of tears. After what seemed like several hours I stopped crying. I looked at the magic card I had and it turned out to be incredibly powerful. Suddenly we all became our cards. I became this spider-monkey thing. I tried to tell them about the card, and when I did my voice sounded very weird. Frail somehow. I said “It has 8.. no 6 legs, and 6 arms.” The spider-monkey thing started fighting this vampire demon that was one of my friends, and it was a lot more powerful.

After this I woke up, that same sense of crying and panic still in me. I got up, fed the cats, had some water and went back to sleep. The next time I woke up I felt completely rested. The bed was warm and fuzzy, inviting me to stay there for the entire day. I lie in bed for about an hour, just breathing, before I realized that I had some stuff to do in town. I got my mail, and it was a letter from my old bank. They let me know that I was finished paying down the loan I had taken 2 years earlier. I broke into a huge smile as the symbolism dawned on me. Leaving old energies behind. It certainly felt that way. I felt this immense calm, and within that calm rested the feeling of panic still. Calm and panicky at the same time, who knew?

After that I went to get a wireless networking card for Ingerid’s computer, and the guy gave me a 30% discount. Then I went to buy catfood, and they gave me a 10% discount. After that I decided to buy breakfast, and even there I got 10% discount. Some old beliefs about money have definitely been released in the past few days. I felt incredibly light, like I was just flowing through my surroundings as they appeared in my reality. Something has definitely shifted, and I am ready. Ready to let go of everything. Ready to be completely empty.

A world of Symbols.

Posted in My path with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 21, 2009 by freedomofnow

Soooo! Here it is again. So much has happened, yet as usual the outwardly action is limited, although it feels like it is picking up somehow. It “started” on the 11th november, which is a 11:11:11 portal, when the book “Before I AM” by Mooji arrived. It is such a beautiful read, I pageflip every night before going to bed. It’s definitely not coincidental that that book arrived on that very day. Then last sunday, Mooji was holding an online satsang that I “happened” to be online at the right time to attend. Right before it started Ingerid was visiting to pick up some DVDs that I had burnt for her, and as per usual when I am in the same space as her I was in a very good mood.

Then it began. As soon as I saw Mooji with his red shirt on it struck me that I had seen this meeting some days ago, only I interpreted it as a visit to London. When it dawned on me all kinds of emotions started to flood through me. Anxiety, a nervousness, fear, it all came up. It felt like this was it. This was the time for my mind-made “I” to die, and I knew I had to face it. An hour went and I had made a few calls although none had gone through, and I decided that this was it. I called repeatedly until finally I saw the video initializing screen come up. Mooji was still in another call, and how lucky that was because I could not have said anything if I had tried. After a few minutes I heard the host of nevernothere announcing me and I just had to jump into it. I made this into a video and uploaded it to youtube, so without further adue, I give you my first conversation with Mooji.

Monday came and I was feeling a bit restless, like something was off but I had no idea why. I had slept my usual 12 hours and I felt a bit out of sync that day. I knew I wanted to clean the appartment, but I just had no energy whatsoever to do anything. The evening came and eventually sleep settled in. I woke up on tuesday feeling very rested. I was supposed to have been at Ingerids for satsang, but she had sent me a message saying she wasn’t feeling good so it was cancelled. My cell phone is currently not receiving text messages except for immediately when I turn it on, and I had a feeling that it wasn’t a day for satsang, so I checked right away when I woke up to the clock at around noon. It’s wonderful being in a position where I have to set the clock if I want to get up before noon. :p

I had one sensation when I got up: I had to get this appartment cleaned right away! I put my laptop in the kitchen and started playing my youtube playlist of music. It holds just about all kinds of music that I have found resonance in depending on mood. This time it started off with a beautiful tibetan monk chant to set the mood, then it gave me Jason Mraz – All dialed in, a song that always makes me cry, and to top it all off, Portishead – Roads.. So while I was crying my eyes out and cleaning the appartment, I gradually felt more and more energized. Once I was done with cleaning and the long, warm shower, I felt great. I was feeling happy the entire day.

That night I dreamt about Ingerid. We were talking about the connection we had, that’s all I remember. That morning Ingerid woke me up at 1pm and asked me if I wanted to come help her carry some stuff at her house that neither she or John could carry while she cleaned the appartment. I felt a tremendous joy and accepted right away. Ingerid came and picked me up a bit later. On the way over we were talking about Mooji and how it would be such an experience to go to London on one of his Satsangs, and it just burst out of me: I’ll buy all of us a tour to London to see Mooji! As I said it I felt such a spontaneous joy. Ingerid was so grateful she got so flustered with emotion that she almost drove off the road. Once we got to their place we sat down and had a cup of tea while we were talking about – and listening to – my conversation with Mooji. First Ingerid said that the fact that out of all the people listening that I was one of the people who got through to speak to him was a very good pointer to where I am right now, and when Mooji said that I was “in the taste of that” with his loving smile, Ingerid smiled and said that’s the feeling she gets around me aswell. John elaborated on this and said that this was all on my own, not in the company of anyone else, and a major turning point for me. It actually felt like it aswell, although there was no sense of pride, there was only joy and love for myself. Then we proceeded to talk about Love Lines, and John felt inspired to include me in the creation. Because Love Lines is completely guided by spirit, the kind of publisher we want is one that comes from a place of joy, and who is able to let our company work through his equipment. I’ve always been able to “see” what Ingerid suggests in its whole, and when they told me about their World Galleries, I immediately got a feeling of the building and some images. John had already drawn his vision, and when he showed me it was almost as a deja vu for me. It was perfect, complete. Very exciting times indeed.

The day continued. Carpets needed cleaning so I spent hours outside hammering carpets, carrying various things, rearranging a room, only to arrange it back, and then rearrange it back to its original state again. I was clearly “chopping wood and carrying water.” We took some breaks to talk and have a bite of food during the day. During one break we were talking about spirit, which we always do I guess.. And I heard exactly what I was supposed to hear, as I always do.. Ingerid said, “Every answer is a death.” which hit home for me very profoundly. The past days I had been feeling like all the answers my mind give me, are so limiting that I don’t believe them. Even its questions, because they always lead to conclusions beyond the now. Beyond what is at the moment. The day came to an end and they drove me home late that night. I had a bite to eat, a shower and saw “The Kings of Comedy” on Tv before going to bed. That night I slept like a baby. This night I dreamt about both Ingerid and John. We were talking about the connection between us, and it turned out that me and Ingerid had been having the same dreams lately. The next dream I had was so vivid. I saw aliens coming to the planet, and a planet coming very close to ours. Aliens landing and a huge fight between the aliens and us. I was strolling peacefully through it all though.

I woke up the day after feeling totally rested, and in complete joy. 10 minutes after waking up, Ingerid called and asked when they could pick me up, to which I replied right away, though John had to take Maren and her son home first. I went out to the road and waited for them and John stopped to pick me up. I was so happy to see them all, and me and Nathaniel were dancing to the music in the car all the way to Marens’ place. On the way home I explained my dream to John and he said that it was a realigning with my Self. He then proceeded to talk about the symbolism of dreams, that I knew of and that being the reason why I sought his expertise, but this time he also mentioned that the waking state is also a dream, and that everything is symbolic. He had shown me some symbolism in my presence earlier, but when we talked about it this time it felt more significant. He told me it’s all about what catches your attention, and listening to what your intuition tells you. I said that I could definitely use some help interpreting all this in the future, and he said that I should first open myself up to the fact that they are there and seek within myself first.

The day passed and we got the rest of the cleaning done, which was such a relief. Ingerid explained that we clean our appartment when we have taken a step “forward” in vibration.. When the current state around us is of the vibration that we used to hold, it is easy to feel dragged down by your surroundings, which is exactly how I felt. The love we hold for ourselves is reflected around us. Puts cleaning in a whole new light. In the evening Ingerid’s other daughter, her man and their child came by and we watched a movie, then they drove me home.

I was conscious just in the moment that the veil of sleep was pulled down, and with the last breath I felt the embrace of the formless. It really is indescribable. I used to have these sensations all the time, but before they would send vibrations of fear throughout my body, and I would shiver in horror. Now it is like the shell of my body is gently melted away to reveal the loving nothingness of my soul flowing out into infinity. I woke up on friday having slept like a baby yet again. It was around 2pm or so. I decided to go and make breakfast right away because I was very hungry. When I was done I reached for a small plate to put them on, and it slipped in my fingers and went for the floor. It hit the floor looking like it would break into 1000 pieces, but what was left was 2 just about identical pieces of porcelain. One had 2 red flowers on it and 2 yellow, the other had one red flower on it and one yellow.

It iimmediately struck me that this was significant for me, so as I grabbed another plate and went into my room I asked for the meaning of this to be shown to me. As I got into the room John immediately logged on, and I asked him what this could mean. He said that I was breaking my fast. Not the normal kind around easter when people don’t eat for 14 days. This was a spiritual fast. I was not “eating of” the manna bread, spiritual truth. The flowers are a confirmation 22:11, a power number. I googled the manna bread and got “11th Heaven Homemaking.” John filled in that that was just a symbol of life, and that I was beginning to nurture myself, loving myself. Metaphors are simple, but we often analyze their meaning away. It is the inner guidance that shows you the truth.

This felt very right for me, and I thanked John for his help and decided to go to town to pick up some money that a friend of mine owed me. She’s quite angry, and she’s owed me this money for quite some time now and I sent her a quite harsh sms the other day to which her anger flared up. So I came to town and met her where she worked and she handed me an envelope with the money and turned her back to me doing some work while we were talking. I thanked her for the money and left to get some food. I grabbed a trolley and got inside the store, and while I was enjoying the sweet taste of a chilled coke, I turned around and suddenly there was Ingerid’s other daughter and her newborn daughter. The daughter is adorable beyond words and her mother is a very loving mother, it was a very pleasant meeting. We talked and walked around the store for some time while we shopped and then we headed for the exit. I was so happy to see them and we both smiled as we parted. I took my shopping bags and headed home, but I felt the need to take a detour down to the walkway by the river. As I was riding my bike along the side of the river, feeling the fresh air and listening to the sound of gushing water around me, I suddenly saw a light shine in the middle of the dark waters. It was still for a few seconds, shining at me, before I realized that it was a very tall light from a far that was reflected. I got home, and hailed John to speak about what had just happened. I told him that some more symbols had appeared, but instead of asking him what they meant I listened to my intuition to see the meaning.

It all felt like it was me turning my back towards my anger and my past, and being greeted by my newborn love for myself, shining my light in the middle of the darkness. John confirmed all of it, and added: the light shines in the darkness and the darkness comprehends it not, which is a biblical quote. I should feel excited, happy, elated that I was getting things right, but it felt so natural.. like part of the flow. There was just acceptance in me, and a sense of being guided completely.

Later that day John was coming to pick up some DVDs that I had burnt for them, but as he was driving here Ingerid called and asked me to come help her with one last thing, which I accepted gladly. I was sitting and writing this post as I heard a very unique cat sound that John makes when he tries to communicate with cats, so I thought he was outside saying hello to my cats and decided to go meet him. As I got outside it was raining, and I found shelter between the house where I live and the garage of my landlord. I stood there and suddenly I hear Ramses, one of my cats, squeak and I see him rush towards me. He is so cozy, brushing up against my leg and practically jumping up on me to cuddle. He’s a very loving cat but usually not this extreme. Suddenly he went out in the rain, caught something in his mouth and ran and dropped it at my feet. I bent down to look, and it was the tip of a flower. Such a beautiful love declaration from my Self, to my Self.

John came and I told him what had just happened and how I felt about it, and he confirmed that aswell. Then he told me that symbols are everywhere, because life always throws an abundancy of seeds to make sure of its own survival, so if you’re completely open to this you will be bombarded. We kept talking and I suddenly realized that symbols are a kind of first-row in the flow of life. If you don’t see the symbols then they start to become silent whispers, taps on the shoulders, frying pan in the faces and eventually something terminal. John said that there was another even closer way, which is direct communication with your Self. This is where you receive insights directly through your being. I remember having these experiences too when I first tasted the formless. For 3 days I was “channeling” Source, and all I had to do was wonder about something and the answer came through my being. It is very profound because it sort of opens you up to the knowing of it, instead of seeing it through the head.

We got to their place and realized that we had no dinner, so me and John drove back to town to get some stuff from me and the store. When we came to my place the first thing that hit us was the thick smell of smoke from my neighbour. John asked me who was smoking, and I said that it was my neighbour. I noticed her sitting in the kitchen and her door fully open, the entire appartment reeking of smoke. I said hello to her, and she replied that it was a very awful thing for us to say, commenting on her smoking. I had asked her to keep her door closed before because I have smoked for 12 years and I don’t want to surround myself with it anymore, since smoking really is an inner desire to leave this world. When I confronted her before she snapped completely accusing me of having an agenda and saying that it doesn’t smell like smoke at all. When she snapped I felt anger arise in me, and at the same time I turned away and walked into my room almost instinctively. Me and John talked about this on the way home and feelings of fear and anger came up. I completely allowed them to be there as we drove home.

When we got back to their place I explained everything to Ingerid, including the previous encounter with my neighbour. Ingerid said that this is what I had been doing for so many lives. I deny myself in order to please others. I let others treat me badly, and instead of standing up for myself I turn the anger inwards towards, beating myself up about it. This was the anger that I had been taking with me from my previous lives. She also said that this was something that Shaumbra does because on some level we know it doesn’t matter, but it was time to reclaim our self worth. Suddenly I expanded beyond my body, losing all references of up-down-left-right, and a dizzyness hit me. I felt a huge wave of anger pass through me and vanish, and then came the sorrow. Sorrow that I had not treated myself with the love that is who I truly am. I suddenly realized that the highest purpose for me, the highest love for my Self, is always the highest purpose in any situation. I did not have to allow my neighbour to let the entire appartment reek of old cigarettes.

It is ok to be true to myself regardless of how it made others feel. It is actually the greatest gift you can give.

Back to Source.

Posted in My path with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on October 16, 2009 by freedomofnow

Love is the essence of who we are.

It’s been a long time since I have posted anything. After my profound, wordless experience with the infinite I had a couple of days of complete freedom, and then hit the deepest sense of hopeless emptiness that I have ever felt. I had never felt it before that time, and it struck me like a frying pan to the face with its sense of despair. Everything became an effort, even getting out of bed. The world was grey, tasteless. I found some comfort in teachings of Mooji, Adyashanti, Eckhart Tolle, Neale Donald Walsch, etc. Some moments of stillness where I felt myself expanding, but this feeling held me back. I could not get past it, and I did not know why. I would go into the feeling and poke at it with my attention, accept it, ask for help releasing it.. It even affected Maren – who I was living with – and her child. He would go into these screaming fits and after he had released what he had in him he would point at me and tell Maren I was very angry. It was true, I was extremely angry. The world owed me for all the things it had put me through, and for what I was feeling at the moment.

And then in the beginning of september it was time for a session with Ingerid and John. I came there and my expectations of a similar experience from last time were quickly let down by the pace of things.. It was a day of observing, but within me I screamed for validation. I was justified in my sense of hopelessness. I left there that night with a reality check, and the next day I realized that I had chosen to believe in the drama, in the feelings of hopeless desperation.. The days passed and turned into weeks, and I still felt trapped. I was told to let go, to give up, and all the signs pointed towards death and rebirth. Maren connected with her twin flame, and I painfully realized I had not given up on the two of us at all. In addition to everything else I was feeling there was a deep sense of abandonment aswell. Then late september I realized I had to move out, so I went looking for an appartment.. About an hour later Maren called to tell me the same thing, so we had an agreement. I found this cozy small ground-level appartment with a big window facing a forest and the mountains. Maren gave me the last cat of the batch that she was originally going to keep, so now I had 3 loving cats with me.. I was surrounded by love, but I didn’t feel it.

I moved in the 1st october. I had realized that there was no point resisting what would come anymore, that clinging on to my ego and its ideas only brought me pain and suffering. By then I had come to the point where I said “I give up,” and “I surrender” several times daily, and also several times per hour I would pray to be free because the pain felt overwhelming.

Last wednesday I gave Ingerid a call, I don’t remember why, but she had just come out of a major channeling and wave of new energy, so when she picked up she said that I obviously was supposed to take part in that too. We talked for about 30 minutes, and then we hung up. Almost immediately I heard this rumbling outside, so I looked out, and right outside my window an avalanche roared down the mountain. A quite striking symbol of things falling.

Then this tuesday it was finally time for a session with Ingerid and John again, and I had a feeling of something growing.. A sensation of something big about to happen. On the morning before I left for Ingerid’s place I prayed that this be the day I would “get it.” I felt quite calm in my chaos, like someone had put a muffler between me and it. I met Ingerid in town and we bought breakfast before we went to her place to start the session.

Once we got there I told her about a dream I had had where I was holding a speech about Atlantis, and we talked about previous lives. I mentioned I had an affiinity for china and martial arts, and her eyes went wide as she said “You’ve been a samurai!” And she started getting messages and images from my previous lives.

I was the brother of the emperor a long time ago in china, but because I was too naive and soft I was not chosen for the role of emperor, so I became a samurai. Not for the purpose of war, but as a bodyguard to the emperor. There was a garden that I loved, and I would train for hours every day in it. Also on the smooth polished stone stairs to the emperor there was a patio(?) with a magnificent view where I would train. Then I was deceived and everything got taken from me, but because I was so naive I did not understand what was happening until it was too late. My brother had deceived me – and when Ingerid said this John immediately got a vision of my brother in that life being my father in this one. The sorrow I felt was so deep that I didn’t even try to fight to keep it, I just left everything behind and walked away from it all.

Straight from that life to Russia. I was a man in a power position. I had everything, but I didn’t care. I lived a life of vodka, and used women. Not in a cruel way, but just because I didn’t care. The emptiness I felt was so great. Ingerid also got a vision of that being the life where I started searching. Like being in a deep forest and searching for the rays of sun breaking the crowns of the trees. Then her eyes went wide again, and she explained “Do you know how you died in that life?!” It turned out I wanted out so bad that I had paid someone to take my life, but because I was afraid of dying I wanted them to do it when I least expected it. I had taken these energies with me past death, and that was what I had been feeling of late. I actually felt a sense of pride of the way that I chose to go the last time. If you’re going to go, might aswell go with a bang, eh?

After that life I had been on another planet. I asked Ingerid if that’s why I had an affinity to Mars, and she got shivers as I did.. John explained that sometimes when the pain is too deep we go to some interdimensional place to create a buffer for that kind of feelings until we are ready to face them.. And suddenly it hit me like a ton of bricks. That was why I hadn’t felt. I had chosen not to feel until I was ready to take on the pain of my past lives. What Ingerid told me rang so true, and it correlated so much with experiences and feelings I had had throughout my entire life. I recognized the dreadful anticipation and fear of my life in russia, the enormous sense of loss and abandonment from my life in china, and suddenly I felt a sense of peace deep in my stomach. Ingerid was told that I had had enough for that time, and we called it a day. They drove me to town because they had some grocery shopping to do. As we walked into the store I felt very wobbly in my knees, and suddenly it hit me.. “I am in Source.” I looked at Ingerid and she just smiled knowingly and said that she could tell. When I rode my bike home things had taken on a new sparkle. There was a new sense of depth to everything I saw.

That night I dreamt that I was chasing a girl through a labyrinth for a very long time, and when I finally caught up to her, nothing was as it seemed. I woke up feeling very refreshed around noon the day after, looked at my phone, and it seemed that my ex had called me. My dark night of the soul-ex. I rang her up and it immediately struck me that this was some sort of full circle closure. I felt only gratitude for what we had experienced together, and the same deep sense of peace was still with me from yesterday.

After we spoke I decided to get up and make breakfast. Even though I felt peaceful I had a sense of distress in me. I decided to go for a bike ride. I didn’t know exactly why, but I felt compelled to ride a route I hadn’t taken before. The road led me up a mountain pass. The wind was against me and it was slightly uphill, but I felt that I had to go.. Besides, the trip back was going to be very smooth I told myself. After an hour and a half I made it to the end of the road and a mail-truck drove past me to the last house on the road. I asked the mail-woman if the road continued ahead and she told me it did stopped just up the hill, so I decided to keep going. The last part of the road was a 2 kilometer rise at about 20-30 degree angle. It was so bad I had to stop about 50 meters before making it all the way. I looked back and saw the landscape stretch down all the way to the sea past the harbour of the city, it was very beautiful so I took some pictures, and then I decided to push my bike the rest of the way up the road. The vision that met me when I finally reached the top made me realize why I had taken the trip. I stood on huge rocks covered with soft moss, looking at mountains on the right, snow clad mountains on the left and a forest in autumn colors framing in a large, placid mountain lake. At that moment I felt love surround me, embrace me. It was so overwhelming that I cried. Tears of happiness running down my face. It was just so beautiful. I had never cried because of happiness before. Crying used to be reserved for “weak” people, but this time I let it all come.

I sat there, looking out on the beautiful landscape for about an hour before I decided to head back. I felt so light, like all the worries of the world had been lifted off my shoulders. Every single cell in my body was – and still is – vibrating with a sense of peace, joy, love and freedom like I never knew was possible. A deep sense of love, love for myself, for the first time that I can remember. I finally realize what all the teachings mean when they say “Stay as the observer.” Now whenever some feeling come, regardless of what it is, I just rest with my love for myself, and it flows through me by itself.

I AM that I AM.